running

After Hannah was born I had a desire to start running again. This desire was so strong, and so unusual for me, that her dad and I argued about whether or not it was appropriate for me to buy a jogging stroller. I insisted I would use it regularly. He said no way, it wasn’t worth the money. When we split up, one of the first things I did was go out and buy a jogging stroller — as soon as it went on sale, of course.

And, I started running. Religiously.

I quickly found a brand and style of running shoe that worked for me. No blisters. I had the size, brand, and style memorized and I never cared about color. Since then, I’ve gone through different phases with running. Sometimes I run 6 times a week sometimes I don’t run for months. But I always had my trusty running shoes.

A few years ago I decided to work on my run — improve my stride, breathing, and eventually my pace or maybe even run a marathon. It was hard work.

Then, a funny thing happened. I started getting blisters! The same shoes — same style, same brand, same size — started giving me blisters and other problems that made running feel … impossible.

I went through a phase where I didn’t run much. I switched to a different style from the same brand and it didn’t work. I went to running shoe experts that insisted I must have the wrong size. But, no matter what I did, I just got more blisters.

I went to another expert on running shoes and I explained my problem. When I received the standard explanation about cause, I insisted that was not the problem. And finally, someone listened. We talked about all the possibilities and then I received a series of shoes to try that might work. And, I found a new pair of shoes!

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So, what’s the point? A new pair of shoes… who cares?

I wanted to improve my run and, when I did, the shoes that had always worked in the past, were no longer suitable. To continue improving, I needed to update my tools to reflect my new abilities.

This story is illustrative of the ways so many things in my life have changed over the last few years. I have worked hard to improve myself in many different ways. And finally, finally! I feel like I am seeing and feeling those improvements. But, just like with my run, I have needed to let go of the old way of doing things, no matter how comfortable those things once were, and embrace the discomfort that comes with change.

Now, I am running. Running into the future — embracing change and discomfort even though I don’t know where the path will lead.

5 thoughts on “running

    1. Thanks Aunt Mary. I actually think my post was more about growth and improvement rather than change for the sake of change. Sometimes growth means letting go of old habits or dreams, no matter how well they once worked. Growing is uncomfortable.

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